


Fall Awake

by Tengo



Category: AFI
Genre: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Occult, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 23:45:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5763502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tengo/pseuds/Tengo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Davey's been missing for years and all it takes is one phone call for Adam to come running home. Just what will he find waiting for him when he gets there? More, importantly, what about afterwards?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fall Awake

**Author's Note:**

> This is something that has been languishing on my hard drive for a while now. It's also a fic that I had posted on the old AFIslash archive (rip). Lately, I've felt the urge to dust it off and start working on it again. It's just one of those fics that won't leave me alone. It's an homage to road tripping, reconnecting with people you clicked with on a soul deep level, the fucked up things that growing up dysfunctional does to a person, and occult.
> 
> I'll be adding more tags as they become necessary (and as I write beyond the couple of chapters I already have). The major one, the non-con, is going up cause it's crucial and I don't want anyone blindsided (well, at least not by that haha).

Something was chasing me. I was slowly weakening because of the thing behind me. My senses were too sharp. All it would take was another tiny nudge and I was dead. I knew that I wasn't long for this world as it was but I just needed a little farther to go. I had to make it. Back to where I originally disappeared. 

I heard the crunch of pine needles steadily gaining on me over my labored breathing and my own crunching footfalls. I was so close. I just needed a few more yards. That's when I felt my the back of my neck prickle and -

I woke with start. Distantly I heard the phone going off on my nightstand. My pulse was racing and I felt cold and clammy from the adrenaline flooding my veins. This was the third night in a row that I had woken up from a dream terrified or in a deep despair. These nightmares bothered me because they came in cycles and it had been years since the last one.

As I calmed down, I realized that the phone had quit ringing for quite some time. I took a quick peek at my alarm clock, 2:30 AM. Jesus Christ, who was calling me in the middle of the night? Someone better have died to call at such an ungodly hour.

I sat up and grabbed the phone to check who called me. My mother? Why would she call at this time? She was a major stickler for propriety, not that it did much good with my dad and me. I hit redial.

After half a ring my mom picked up, “Adam?”

“Mom, what the hell are you doing calling me at this time of night?” I manage to croak out.

“Watch your mouth with me, you're still my son,” She admonished me.

“I'm sorry mom. Now what was so important you had to wake me up from a deep sleep?” She didn't need to know it wasn't exactly her that had woken me up.

“It's sort of a good news/bad news scenario.” She answered sounding cagey.

“I'm running on 3 hours of sleep, please just spit it out already.” I was exhausted and still on edge about that nightmare and it was making me sound slightly irritated.

“It's just...” She trailed off and I almost growled in frustration. “It's just that the police found David tonight. They were called out because someone thought there was something suspicious going on at the old Posey farm. You know, the one north of town? The one you boys loved going up to raise some hell at? Anyway, I don't know how they missed him. I mean, they must have combed those woods at least a dozen times. Despite that, they finally found his body.”

There was a rushing noise and for some reason I couldn't move. I couldn't process this. No, it just couldn't be real. My apartment felt like it had dropped ten degrees in the past few seconds. My body on the other hand, it seemed to be on fire and my soul was looking for a way out.

“Do you know anything more, mom?” My voice sounded strained even to my ears.

“Oh honey, I wish I did. I'm so sorry.” She said.

“Are you sure? There's nothing else?” I couldn't help it, my voice broke the last word.

“No, I'm sorry.” Weirdly, my mother sounded even more apologetic.

I hung up. My mother could chew me out later for my lapse of manners. Hopefully though she would understand that I just needed time and space to process it all. I didn't know how to feel, on one hand I felt numb and hollow inside but on the other hand I wanted to break shit and unleash my anger in the most destructive manner possible.

Suddenly my tiny studio apartment felt too small and like it was about to suffocate me at any second. Now was probably a good time for a walk. I quickly jammed a ratty pair of converse on my feet and grabbed a jacket. Three steps from my bed I was at my front door with keys and wallet in hand. I stood for a moment on the deck outside my apartment and took a couple of deep breaths of the still, chilly air. The towering pines in this town never failed to help instill a sense of calm in me.

After double checking that my door was in fact locked, I took the short flight of stairs down. I almost entertained the idea of just hopping in my car to drive around but the fact that my tank was nearly empty and that payday was still days away pretty well cured me of that. I started walking towards the nearest 7-11, which was a few blocks over.

I heard the breeze sigh through the trees and stuck my hands deep in my jacket pockets. A years ago I had moved down here after graduating early. The move had been in part to start junior college and in part to finally try to move on with my life. Ukiah was just too choked with memories of Davey that had turned painful, that quite often all I had wanted to do was to cut myself open to give vent to emotions I didn't particularly wanted to name. I never did though, all I managed was to barely slump through high school in a near constant haze. 

Despite my best efforts with a few drugs and the omnipresent alcohol, I managed to maintain a solid B through out high school. Of course such an average report card slightly disappointed my parents but they really didn't question it too much. I guess they were just glad I wasn't emulating my cousins with their “bad habits” and dropping out to form bands. Honestly, I was a bit envious of them because I always felt like rocking the boat would lead too much uncomfortable scrutiny from my parents about my own personal habits. They just wouldn't particularly understand my motivations or the emotional maelstrom lurking inside their semi 'perfect son'.

My ruminations had carried me at a surprisingly fast pace to 7-11's parking lot. I quickly crossed the parking lot and entered the store. I dimly heard the clerk greet me while I briefly stopped to scan the store. My eyes lighted on the liquor section. I casually strolled over and took a quick peek at their selection. I swiped a relatively cheap bottle of vodka and nonchalantly wedged it in my jacket. After accomplishing that, I wandered over to the non-alcoholic drink section and picked out a two liter of coke.

I headed over to the counter to pay for my bottle of coke. I hoped that between the graveyard shift and the probable drug use, the clerk wouldn't notice the slight line the bottle of vodka made against my jacket. I usually swung by here somewhere between two-thirty and three am and the clerks were almost always were so stoned that they barely cared.

The guy behind the counter rang me up with an indifferent look on his face. I quickly paid and left. Once again, I had been successful in my illicit procurement of booze. I supposed that I needn’t worry so much after all.

I was in the middle of the parking lot when I happened to look up and I saw an odd mist sort of hanging around the trees closest to me on the left. It was sort of gray and for some reason it made the back of my neck prickle with apprehension. I quickly looked around to see if there was any mist anywhere else and I had been too lost in thought to notice. There wasn't any anywhere else.

That's when my feet decided to start walking again and this time much faster than before. I still felt my skin prickle and I somehow knew I had just had to get out of there as soon as possible. I grabbed the bottle of vodka and stuck it in the same bag with the coke. 

I suddenly found myself taking the stairs to my apartment two at a time and quickly unlocked my door. I squeezed inside, breathing hard from my brisk walk home. It usually took me twenty minutes to get to that 7-11 and another twenty to get back. This time however I'm fairly certain I made it home in ten minutes. After leaning against the door, I turned around and did up all the locks with a slightly shaky hand.

I took five steps over to my micro kitchenette and grabbed a semi clean glass. A few shambling steps and I crash landed on my bed. I set the glass on my rather crowded nightstand and dug out the bottles from the bag beside me. I opened the bottle of vodka and poured it into the glass about a quarter full. Next came three quarters of coke. 

I took a swig and felt the alcohol's burn. It seemed to only be a few grades above being classified as rubbing alcohol. That was fine by me. I took another swig and felt my eyes water. I ignored it however and concentrated on the palisade of fire it was tracing on its way to my stomach. After finishing my first drink, I poured myself another and my thoughts circled back to Davey.

Oddly enough when I thought about it, it was nearly 5 years to the day that Davey had disappeared. We were both fourteen and it was late summer. Last time I saw him, we were perched in the limbs of this giant pine tree we had somehow managed to climb. He was chattering on about this album called “Violator” by some British band that had come out recently and he hadn't shut up about it for what seemed like eons. He liked to posture that he was above mainstream pop music but yet he always had a Top 40 station preset on his stereo. I cracked a grim smile at the memory.

I squinted at my alarm clock. It read four thirty am. I groaned and guzzled the last of my drink. I was supposed to be in class in a few hours and then work later. I sighed resignedly. I had been doing so well to get my life aimed to take me where I wanted and here Davey cropped up to shake up my life.

I sighed once more and I picked up the phone to leave a message for my boss that a family emergency had come up that I really needed to take care of. My boss was a decent guy and treated me like a son, so I knew he would understand. I worked part time at his garage doing odd jobs while picking up a bit of the trade at the same time.

Next on my list was grabbing a nearby backpack and unceremoniously dumping out its contents on my bed. As soon as the last sheets of paper had managed to settle down, I was stuffing a few spare changes of clothes and a few other necessities. I stopped for a moment trying to think of anything else I might need.

I quickly got up off my bed and knelt in front of it. After some rummaging, I finally came up with my prize. It was a wad of what consisted of my life savings. Call it a premonition but I had a feeling I was going to need it for some reason.

I stood up and dusted off the knees of my jeans. I grabbed the vodka and stuffed it, along with my roll of cash, in my backpack. After zipping it up, I swung it over my shoulder and left my tiny apartment. As I locked the door, I couldn't help but to feel a certain pang that I couldn't put my finger on.

I descended the stairs and walked over to my car. It was a Toyota built in 1991 and it was a shade of red that promised to fade to pink as it aged. My parents had bought it from Davey's mom, Mrs. Marchand, after she fell behind on payments. I never could quite figure out their reasoning or how they thought I wouldn't find out. Maybe they thought I'd be over the moon or something to finally get a car. Don't get me wrong, I was, but the whole thing just left a perpetual weird taste in my mouth like month old roadkill.

I shrugged off the morose memories and climbed into my car. I turned over the engine and checked the fuel gauge. Seeing that it was only half full, I decided that I needed to scoot over to a gas station and top her off before I left. It was close to a five hour drive back to Ukiah from South Lake Tahoe and I really didn't want to make any unnecessary stops if I could help it.

Before I pulled out I quickly decided to forgo visiting my favorite 7-11 for liquor pilfering and opted to hit a gas station closer to the edge of town. Pulling out, I took one last look at the brown building that I had hung my hat for the past two years. I felt another odd little pang and rather than examining it, I peeled out.

A few minutes later I pulled into a gas station and was filling up my little Corolla. While I was still filling up the tank, I reached back into my car and dug around in my backpack to peel off ten dollars to pay for gas. I heard the gas nozzle click right as I closed the driver's side door. I hung up the nozzle and strode inside to pay. I finally made it to the clerk and told him I was here to pay for pump number three. I saw him check and I definitely caught the weird look he tried to repress.

“Yes, it's that red Corolla over there,” I replied to his unasked question in an almost bored tone.

“Fine, whatever man” he said still trying to keep that look off his face. “That will be six dollars and thirty three cents”

I received my receipt and change. I didn't give the idiot behind the counter the satisfaction of seeing me angrily striding over to my car. Instead I merely strolled out and made a mental note to avoid this gas station for a few weeks. I knew that idiot wouldn't last too much longer.

With that bit of business taken care of, I started up my car and pulled out onto the highway. I knew that I probably wasn't going to like was I what I was about to face. Nonetheless, I couldn't resist what was calling me back to the town I had fought so hard to escape.


End file.
